Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Tearing It Updots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Cordell
    ASL Info:    36/M/Philadelphia P.A.
    Elite Ratio:    3.01 - 592/806/391
    Words: 113
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 463
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 782



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTearing It Updots
    -------------------------------------------


    Gripping on your pelvis
    Loving this temptress
    Girl I wanna feel you up

    Temperature is rising
    Girl I'm not surprised at
    How you're tearing me up

    Flipped up, worked out
    Tell me girl, what it's all about
    Tell me softly don't interrupt

    Sit down on my lap
    Tell me girl where it's at
    Tell me if it's thick or fat

    Booty on the dance floor
    Begging mercy for more
    Tell me where do I sign up at

    I'm gripping on your pelvis
    Loving this like elvis
    Girl I wanna eat you up

    Temperature is rising
    Girl don't be surprised at
    How I'm tearing It up

    ...




    Submitted on 2010-11-30 16:07:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      woah! i cant tell if this is about dancing on the floor, or between the sheets! i love how you can add that sexual vibe without actually being overly sexual, most poems like this are usually dirty and im glad to say this one isnt.. and i mean come on! i love how you added the bit about elvis :)!
    | Posted on 2010-12-01 00:00:00 | by scardnscared | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    188072

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Yes written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    You read free written by poetotoe
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Every..... written by jackz
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Etiquette written by saartha
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry