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    dots Submission Name: Permanent Marksdots

    Author: einna
    ASL Info:    23/F
    Elite Ratio:    5.44 - 11/13/14
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 597
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 658


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    dotsPermanent Marksdots

    You cut me with your harsh words,
    You stab me with your eyes.
    I want so bad to be myself,
    But you make me want to cry...

    You try so hard to make me smile,
    But you only tear me down.
    You put me on your pedastal,
    For me to throw away the crown.

    You protect me from this harsh world,
    You walk me through my fears;
    Then you strand me by the deep end,
    And leave me there for years.

    I will swim to shore myself this time,
    I will find my own way in the dark.
    Your words wont keep me down anymore,
    You will leave no more permanent marks.

    Submitted on 2010-12-04 20:05:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This poem was particularly jerking because I was in a long-term relationship (that I'm still working through, in my own way) and it felt something like this. My efforts usually had a negative impact on her emotions, but sometimes good intentions aren't good enough. The third stanza stuck out to me because I felt like a protector for her, standing in for life's harsher lessons to learn.

    The last stanza summed up the end of my relationship with my ex pretty substantially. Instead of a protector, I was a hinderer. bringing her down. I'm starting to realize people in general, not just lovers, have to be realized, and not bottled up as to say they won't experience anything that life has to offer.

    This was some good writing, and although I don't relate to all the ideas presented, (I don't put people on a pedestal, for example) it was genuinely remarkable of how well this triggered my emotions.
    | Posted on 2010-12-05 00:00:00 | by Dolor | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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