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    dots Submission Name: vengeancedots

    Author: in shadow
    ASL Info:    22/F/ nightmares
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 581/277/103
    Words: 196
    Class/Type: Poetry/Satire
    Total Views: 398
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1061


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    There is a promise made in such sweat, contracts signed with arched backs and writhing forms.
          the skyline was on fire      
    The city was twisting upward, grasping at the stars.
    You held my hand as we watched the night devour everything,
    the sun had stagnated somewhere,
    we lay in darkness.

    I came to steal part of you,
    that night in the back of your father's 1986 Buick Regal. With the windows down and smell of burning leaves filling our lungs.
    I came to tear out your heart
         and eat it.      

    Had the grave you dug me been a little deeper ...
    Had you tied the ropes a little tighter ...
    Had the radiation been a little weaker ...

    Things would have been different
    and someone else would be eating your brain

    Submitted on 2010-12-10 08:33:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      what caught me was the title
    i read the other two comments i think it depends on the person reading this with a title vengeance
    the evil eye can see a much deeper view to yor write either way its going to be added to my favorites

    good write
    | Posted on 2010-12-13 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      This is how girls see the guy after he leaves her after that one time, as a monster who just came to steal. Interesting to see this from the "guys" view...good writ
    | Posted on 2010-12-13 00:00:00 | by Joybell | [ Reply to This ]
      this reminds me of the nickelback song where he sings about how she could kill him and he would still come back for her. i love how you turn the normal mushy love poem into her getting her brains eatten.. pretty cool!
    | Posted on 2010-12-11 00:00:00 | by scardnscared | [ Reply to This ]

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