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When I was in high school,
I had a small circle of friends;
Louie, Dylan and Sandra.

Louie was a baseball guy with a chiseled
face and smile and the girls went to him
without him trying.

Dylan was overweight but still had girls
because he could really talk.

I had neither so I just listened
to their stories over dominoes games
and beer we sneaked
from Louie's father's stash.

Sandra was our friend too
because the other girls
didn't give her a chance
and maybe that's why I liked her.

She was short and a little pudgy
with acne that came and went
but to me she was cute
and she wasn't walled up.

Louie and Dylan didn't see it
so they kept her at friends
even though I think
she wanted it differently.

Then one day,
Sandra thought it fun
to date John, one of the five black guys
that went to our school.

We kept her around but
Louie and Dylan made comments
like "I guess Sandra's been bit
by that Alabama black snake.
I don't want that shit..."

And neither did anyone else.
The girls had always shunned her
but now the few guys that would have
taken her out never had much to say.

But I knew John.
We sat beside each other in Art class.
John barely passed his other subjects
but he wont the Art award
at the end of every year in school.

Once our Algebra teacher asked him
why he didn't apply himself
to his other studies and he said
"I don't love them."

Sandra and John only had a few dates;
football games and movies
and then they called it off
because Sandra said
"There wasn't anything there."

But the rest of the year,
no other guy approached her.
And I found out later in life
that it was the same way in
Mississippi as it was in California
or in England.

Then one day we were
walking down the hall together
and she clutched my arm
and smiled with big eyes
as she squeezed her breast against me.

Then everyone began to look
at me the way the
way they had looked at her
and Louie and Dylan
were guarded the next time
we played dominoes.

I went on my first date
and it was with Sandra.
She had lost weight over the Summer
and I thought she looked better than ever.

I had my first kiss
and it was with Sandra
and I confess that there were images
of her lips wrapped around
a frightening cock

but in time,
I grew out of that.

We were together through high school
and broke up when I went to college
where my girl failures resumed.

But I ran into John years later
at a frame shop.
He graduated with a Master's degree
in Art and was teaching
at a community college
doing framing on the side.

He rushed to shake my hand
and hug me.
He recalled my name and everything
I every tried to draw.

He asked about Sandra and I told him
she had married a much older man
and had two children
and by all accounts was happy.

We talked and he wanted my address
to mail an invitation
to his wedding in two weeks.

I went and had myself
a damn good time
with new friends.

Jackson, MS - 12/11/10