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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: ~fragments~dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: rws
    ASL Info:    57/m/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 2777/1297/258
    Words: 49
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 949
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 362



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots~fragments~dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I
    we live in a rhythm
    between spaces
    where pauses dissolve
    without visible traces

    II
    the crackle and hum
    of fireside chants
    give ghost fables strength
    to rise and dance

    III
    like a raw, red hell
    that hissed in the sea
    the sun made peace
    with destiny




    Submitted on 2010-12-12 08:23:39     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is one of the poems which I wish to go on because I don't want it to end. this is great like the rest of your works. Thanks for sharing.

    Jen
    | Posted on 2012-08-29 00:00:00 | by jeniecel | [ Reply to This ]
      This has a lot of truth in it and I do admire your metaphors, each stanza is so enchanting :) nicely penned!
    | Posted on 2011-07-25 00:00:00 | by AltheaLaochra | [ Reply to This ]
      Hi Bill,

    The rhyme really works here and I'm always in awe of your sparse style that conveys so much.

    It's good to read you!

    Love

    Nan
    | Posted on 2011-06-18 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      like a raw, red hell
    that hissed in the sea
    the sun made peace
    with destiny

    I recently watched a sun set with an ocean backdrop and was amazed at how quickly it seemed to plunge out of sight. Of course there was no hissing in the sea, it simply dropped out of sight. Somehow I want to read your last line as:

    the sun made off with destiny.

    I enjoyed this. ~Chris
    | Posted on 2011-05-25 00:00:00 | by ponykeeper | [ Reply to This ]
      one pause i remember...you second part of this..

    the first time i was introduced to Poe's "telltale heart"

    jamoboree, boy scouts...a priest told us that story by the bonfire, we all sat around enthralled and scared out of our wits...he told it so creepily..and what a voice...and his eyes with the help of the fire maybe? scary stuff..

    nice memory for me though..i like being scared..

    thanks for that..

    and the last part...i picture the sun dropping into the sea and can hear the hiss...

    such description with your usual economy of words...

    i don't do the stalking thing...but i am going to return periodically to check out more of your work...good stuff!

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-03-22 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      I've always thought of sunset as death of the daylight. The night is stronger, darker, and when the night falls asleep, turns gray, the sun sneaks back into the sky, still bleeding red/orange from the beating it took the sunset before.

    Gloaming is simply the sky bruising.
    | Posted on 2010-12-16 00:00:00 | by Runes | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice little individual going-ons. I especially like the last one. It is well titled and has the potential to grow indefinitely, doesn't it?
    | Posted on 2010-12-13 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]


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