Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Bird catchingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: expiring_touch
    ASL Info:    26/f/Hamburg
    Elite Ratio:    4.04 - 136/243/154
    Words: 66
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 558
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 469



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBird catchingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    My dearest is escaping through the wall.
    I try to catch him -

    For the scattered feathers,
    sweet flustered pigeon,
    in my hand

    behold the carnivorous curl -
    malicious lips upon the tightened vessels -

    I'll take the scissors,
    cut the whiteness
    and make my own collage -

    his shaking
    bleeding
    and resentful
    heart
    for backdrop.




    Submitted on 2010-12-22 09:15:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this is so kewl I may not be a bird but I am tempted to let you cut out my heart for a backdrop. I started falling in love with you in the third stanza. The rest of the poem just hammered more nails in my coffin.
    | Posted on 2011-01-01 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      1. It seem hard not to hurt
    2. A certain compliment can be like sharp knife
    3. Reliefed and a bit scattered at the same time
    4. Since I read it here
    5. Of the heart
    6. Its supposed connection to "reality"
    7. How rosty my heart's mirror is...
    8. Non-verbal communication
    9. By a bit more optimism and joy
    10. I would try not to let my fears be a co-author of the piece
    11. Somebody who is trying to convince him or herself of the meaningfulness of life etc. by words
    12. In the extend of 11.
    | Posted on 2010-12-24 00:00:00 | by namenlos | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    188394

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Whispered written by endlessgame23
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry