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It was the search
for warmth
behind those
tired, fragile eyes


It was
vanity
arrogance
ego

that led
to my welcome
demise


I thought
control was within
my grasp

but the blaze
hidden behind
amber irises
was all consuming


no trace remains
of the boy
I was

he let go
of all pretense
and believed

that she
was salvation
that she
was home


so desperate
to call her north
but that stars
already faded


now I sit gazing
for what
has long since passed

Never would I trade
the dream of her
for innocence lost

It was
love
hope
passion

that led
to my most
welcome demise

I searched
for warmth
behind those eyes
to find only ideals

the man
I long
to..

the man
I will
be