i want to say i am useless
with words. but i want to say
i am here, so listen closely:
whatever it is i am about to speak
will be heartfelt, drawn out,
interspersed alternately with
you-knows and i-don't-knows
as i grope soundlessly
for some kind of fluidity,
an influx of swirled ink
from the calligrapher's pen.
it is now, in the evening
that thoughts run rampant
on the open stage of my mind,
interspersed alternately with
i'd-like-to-knows and
maybe-you-don't-cares and
i-hope-they-didn't-notices.
in uncertainty i am predictable,
readable as a shadow in a certain slant of sun,
palpable as a heartbeat,
yet white-capped and uneven as waves.
if you could find me here, between
moments, maybe just before
a sigh;
just after
a smile
i would be open to another way of being;
another way less full
i need intrusion, rough handling,
gentle caress. i want to say
meet me here and you will understand,
you will be rewarded.
i want to explain how i expect too much,
hold too fiercely, hold myself
to standards by which i could only fail
continually. because
i want to know it all;
the mechanics of the heart,
the heart of the mechanic. |
Submission Name: Heart of the Mechanic
