Bottled Inspiration

Author: Ontlogicalamity ASL Info:    33/M/NY Elite Ratio:    4.67 - 190 /194 /45 Words: 29

Class/Type: Poetry /Misc Total Views: 1570 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 185

Description:

---

Bottled Inspiration

---

A subtle sweetness, blended With a tiny bite, bubbly fresh and cold Flows down my gullet like... Wet leaves after an autumn rain. Bass is a damned good beer.

Submitted on 2004-07-27 14:40:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_< 2: I dunno... 3: meh! 4: Pretty cool 5: Wow!

Comments

Wouldn't you gag if wet leaves were flowing down your gullet. Bass beer made me think of fish and the gullet made me think of gills. Do you reckon that bass would drink Bass? They would have to pee in the water they live in though. At least we don't have to do that. Okay? You wanted nonscensical commentary. I especially liked the ...which represented 10 minutes. I considered stopping there and waiting 10 minutes to finish reading, to get the full effect, but thought, nah!

| Posted on 2004-07-27 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest. 2. Try not to give only compliments. 3. How did it make you feel? 4. Why did it make you feel that way? 5. Which parts? 6. What distracted from the piece?

7. What was unclear? 8. What does it remind you of? 9. How could it be improved? 10. What would you have done differently? 11. What was your interpretation of it? 12. Does it feel original?

18862