Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Dyin' Blues


Author: eggshells
ASL Info:    23/M/WA
Elite Ratio:    3.25 - 31 /82 /75
Words: 130
Class/Type: Lyrics /Death
Total Views: 1577
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 1057



Description:


Blues baby!


Dyin' Blues



A man came around Bout half hour ago
Left me with nothin but a smokin' hole.
Don't remember what I did
Maybe somethin' I said.
But that matters no more.
I've Been bleedin'
And I've been thinkin'
About nothin' but you.
Ooooohooohooohoooooohoh
I've got the dyin' blues.
Been watchin' blood fall to the floor
And I couldn't help
But think of you more.
Ooooohooohooohoooooohoh
I've got the dyin' blues.
I watch as I breathe
A simple fading steam
And as it starts to disappear
I feel a creepin' fear
And know it will be only moments
Before I. am. No. Looooonger here.
So, I've been bleedin'
And I've been thinkin'
Bout' nothin but you.
Ooooohooohooohoooooohoh
I've got them dyin' blues...

Finfinfin
End
-eggshells-







Submitted on 2011-01-11 04:52:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  Heck, anything "blues" is cool by definition. Dyin' blues has to be the ultimate "blues" and of course we had to put in a woman in the picture somewhere. Now for a smokey room and some whiskey...
| Posted on 2011-01-11 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
  but if I recover
from the displeasure of a lover
I'll tan my wounds at the beach
with a kevlar towel in reach

Just something. ;)
| Posted on 2011-01-11 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
  There something lyrical and rhythmical in your words and the way they flow with each other. You give me the dyin' blues which is exactly what you should be giving me. If I have such feelings only by reading your work, then you've done marvelously well.

Cheers,

Charmedidentity
| Posted on 2011-01-11 00:00:00 | by charmedidentity | [ Reply to This ]
  i love the blues. not sure why really, because sometimes they are just so sad. it's not that i relish sadness, but moreso the fact that the blues are a feeling music. soulful. lived in.

i like this because i can imagine how the music might sound. it's simple too as well as relatable.

anyhoos...

just some unspecifieds.
| Posted on 2011-01-11 00:00:00 | by isabella | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



188738