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    dots Submission Name: Deathmetalyshriekingdots

    Author: DaleP
    ASL Info:    57/M/TX
    Elite Ratio:    6.21 - 629/553/330
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 338
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 896


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    The mountain
    in tribute
    to metal.
    Voices pierce
    the howl loud shroud
    R.I.P the clouds
    and rain
    down blood.

    Stricken stuck
    venom spit,
    burns out eyes.
    Daemon wise
    the stretched out hand bears a knife.

    The stage ablaze
    the band
    black as plague,
    the crowd lives
    in crimson rage.

    The truth,
    long live

    The thrills to chill while on fire,
    on the pyre.

    Feed the flame,
    be the game,

    you will remember our name.
    you will remember,



    Submitted on 2011-01-16 05:11:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      It's like I always say "glade glaive , don't dale otter" . I used to put a large Buck knife between the tuning pegs of my guitar when I played . I thought it apt since I was fairly adept with it . Then I contemplated , of shroud , building my pyre out of the dismembered bodies of my enemies . I'm sure you're beginning to see why I like this piece . It really speaks to my mystic symbiosis up spiritual sky . Perhaps all my humanitarian efforts are not in vain . I know , what a suffragette but sometimes I can't help myself .
    PS: The heights of sanity are a lofty and precarious perch .
    | Posted on 2011-01-17 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]
      "Death to all but Metal" by Steel Panther. Awesome song.

    One of my favourite genres of music is metal. Maybe not death metal, but I love metal

    I find this to be very reminiscent of lyrics to many songs, it has that perfect kinda vibe to it, I guess. Even if you are writing about the genre, I can see a song sprouting out of this somewhere... The thing about this is that you aren't trying too hard with the words. I find that a lot of the time, people try too hard, with metal music. Sorry, I think I'm speaking more on terms with lyrics, but I think you get what I mean..?
    It has that edge of darkness to it which is apt for this poem. And you certainly mention death. For some reason I think more along the lines of Trivium and Machine Head. Which is weird, both bands are actually thrash metal. I am going way off topic.

    My only picky detail is the rhyme pattern seemed uneven.

    So seriously, copyright this or something, before the bands want to use these lines in their music.

    Just out of curiosity, do you enjoy the wondrous sounds of metal?
    | Posted on 2011-01-16 00:00:00 | by EshyFishy | [ Reply to This ]

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