Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Magic Elfin Treedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: EshyFishy
    ASL Info:    21yo mess having crises
    Elite Ratio:    6.92 - 126/123/57
    Words: 361
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 477
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 2483



    Description:
       Another one from year 7... we had to write a ballad. So I wrote one about a tree. o_O Bash it, whatever. I was eleven and a bit trippeh. ._.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Magic Elfin Treedots
    -------------------------------------------


    (WARNING: Please read the 'description' it will explain a lot!)

    It stood there proud and magnificent
    The ground around it covered in moss
    Strong, tall and definitely beautiful
    The magic Elfin Tree was like a boss.

    June was a small little girl,
    Small she was, but indeed strong
    June was as solid as a rock
    There was nothing she did wrong.

    Walking through the woods one day
    June came across
    a big shadowy figure,
    the ground around it covered in moss.

    June exclaimed a cry of surprise
    as she realised what she had seen.
    It was the magic Elfin Tree!
    And from every branch grew a jellybean!

    "Come and be my friend!"
    said the tree.
    June looked at the tree with such happiness
    "Friends with a talking tree! Imagine all the fun there'll be!"

    They stood there proud and beautiful
    Human and a tree
    How many adventures did they share?
    One or two, maybe more than three!

    The terrible knob of fate had turned,
    June grew up, you see
    The tree was only aging.
    Was it no longer human and tree?

    Many years had passed
    June, walking through the woods to see
    A very special friend of hers-
    The magic Elfin Tree!

    "Hello my friend June!"
    exclaimed the tree
    "Are you glad I came to see you?"
    Said June to the old tree.

    The Tree and June were happy to be
    a friend and friend for the rest of their lives
    So many things in common!
    (apart from the fact June hated chives)

    June was never a 'tree-hugger'
    But in this case she made an exception.
    She squeezed the tree lovingly tight.
    Instead of a tree she was hugging, it was perfection.

    In the Tree's place stood a man
    He was very handsome to look at
    Crystal eyes, perfect features
    Loving every animal, including the little bat.

    He got down
    balancing on his knee
    Staring into June's eyes.
    "Will you marry me?"

    June taken aback
    looked at the 'once-was-a-tree'
    Gazing at him with such happiness
    "Married to a talking tree! Imagine how happy I'd be!"




    Submitted on 2011-01-18 00:05:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Cute and quite enjoyable to read. Thanks!
    | Posted on 2011-06-18 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      A classical ballad has an alternating four three beat. However deviation is allowed. Now as much as I like this
    I was hoping for more than one poem after all I was on the road for five days does that not mean I should be seeing five poems from you? OK back to the poem are u sure u want to marry a tree that produces jelly beans?
    Think of all the time u will spend on the stairmaster unless u want a jellybean belly?
    | Posted on 2011-01-22 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      Whimsical and merry! This threw a smile on my face! :D Hahahaha! I loved every part of it! o.O Who could bash such a pretty piece of mastery?!? You rawck dood! xD
    | Posted on 2011-01-21 00:00:00 | by ShadowsnLights | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    188856

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Records I written by Raphael
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry