Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: conversations #15dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 62
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 251
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 465



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsconversations #15dots
    -------------------------------------------


    when i'm awake
    (birds come out

    while) i'm lost
    (i'm sleeping)

    and you're (filling my dreams)
    far away and (with wings)

    never there (made of air,)
    to greet me (slicing

    the wind) with a soft look
    (through the clouds)

    or a smile (towards the sun)
    to comfort me.

    my reality (so bright)
    is solitude. (above me.)




    Submitted on 2011-01-28 17:17:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      First of all I will make it clear that my present state of mind is not fit to tackle the complexities of your work; in trying to get a hold of whatever is going on inside my own mind I am doing what it seems to be telling me to, which at this moment is to NOT SLEEP. So here I sit, at 3:09 a.m. my time, lost in my own dense woods and yet feeling compelled to attempt some insight regarding a piece of the wonderfulness that you regularly spew.

    Despite my lack of clarity in regards to my own inner processes, the device that you are using of late is not lost on me; each of these conversations consists of two poems: the one within parentheses and the one without. At first, read together, they are somewhat incomprehensible. Read separately, each is whole and simple albeit haunting. Read together a second time, they mesh quite oddly but form a more intriguing piece that shimmers with new found complexity. A simple device, but put to use quite ingeniously.

    I find that as I get older, matters of insanity seem less and less of a mystery; real things make less sense and illogical things seem more agreeable. And each time I come back to your work, it makes more sense. Here, I can see method to your madness. I doubt I could tell you anything new about your work; your nuances are spontaneous but not accidental, and I think there is meaning in all of it, although much of it is lost on the rest of us. You seem to have a better grip on the lightening that every writer tries to grab hold of.

    Here I have wrestled out a lengthy comment and still am not satisfied, but I fear I must stop before I veer off into nonsense (or at least what I think of as nonsense...at this hour normal things seem odd and odd things seem normal). I recognize, and once again am a tad stunned by, the lovely things you are able to communicate. The best I can offer is to try and communicate my own appreciation.

    ~Skye Macadamianut
    | Posted on 2011-01-31 00:00:00 | by Jeniffer | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    189058

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Records I written by Raphael
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Angel Eyes written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love written by saartha
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    prison written by ShyOne
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry