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    dots Submission Name: Coming homedots

    Author: wilted_flower
    ASL Info:    22 f uk
    Elite Ratio:    2.94 - 42/56/28
    Words: 152
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 843
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 898

       My paradelle.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsComing homedots

    Eight months past I fell in love,
    Eight months past I fell in love,
    So deep in love I drowned,
    So deep in love I drowned.
    In eight months love drowned,
    I so deep I feel past deep in love.

    Two months past he left me,
    Two months past he left me,
    Left me and let me burn,
    Left me and let me burn.
    Left me, left me, and two
    Months past let me burn.

    Last night I came to my senses,
    Last night I came to my senses,
    My friends brought me home,
    My friends brought me home.
    My senses brought me to my friends,
    Last night I came home.

    Eight months and two months past,
    My senses deep in love, in burn
    He left me drowned so deep.
    Love left me, I fell,
    I brought me past last night,
    I came home, I-my friends- let me.

    Submitted on 2011-02-04 09:11:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Paradelles are great parodies, right? "Hoaxes" in poetry.

    But this is great! It actually has a meaning to it, and it's rather a sad meaning too.

    This paradelle, makes sense. Billy Collins, have you read his? The last line is just sheer genius, amirite?

    Anyways... yes indeedy, this is a nice poem, I do like. Yup. And I must agree with isabella, there is a song-song vibe when this is read.

    Sorry, this comment isn't really helpful, but hey, it's a paradelle! :D

    | Posted on 2011-02-05 00:00:00 | by EshyFishy | [ Reply to This ]
      this is great. sad. but great. i ended up looking up the form/non-form (smile) and think it is something that would be neat to try.

    what i like most, is that you are forced to use a limited number of words. and what comes up is actually incredible in the almost-randomness.

    here for instance -

    'I so deep I feel past deep in love.'

    too, there is an interesting rythmn going on. almost sing-songy.

    | Posted on 2011-02-04 00:00:00 | by isabella | [ Reply to This ]
      This has a sad feeling to it and echoes of lost memories and adoration comes to the thought of thinking about someone reflecting on love hurting so long ago.
    Paradelle, paradelle.It's flooding with pain of being alone and being left alone.Dropped as or at some sign of trouble.
    I mean this is the type of thinking coming along after reading.Form is unique to me.
    This refers to time.And I so believe time heals all wounds.I wonder about this one though.
    The person is saying 'he let me burn, let me burn'
    giving off an assumption that the person whom done the harm was incorporating pain as a motive.
    That's why I can find it sad.The last two lines has me thinking of overcoming what has tried to kill you.
    It speaks a common pain to the reader about someone who was seriously involved, and getting hurt is common when being seriously involved.
    | Posted on 2011-02-04 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]

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