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    dots Submission Name: conversations #40dots

    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 121
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 691
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 931


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsconversations #40dots

    if i could only explain

    (the deep ocean creatures

    of) myself

    (your eyes drown out) better

    (the shallowness of others.)

    at the right moments.

    (with a single

    watery look)

    i'm often lost

    for words

    and (ancient bricks

    of layered coral)

    my mouth

    won't make the sounds

    (that flow out

    through your salty lips,)

    that say i need you

    (flood the room)

    because i'm better off

    with you

    (with your lovely brine)

    i thought i would be. (made

    from the skeletons

    of a million discarded fish.)

    Submitted on 2011-02-07 17:22:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      "if I could only explain
    (the deep ocean creatures
    of) myself"

    is just a killer opening. I've noticed that a recurring theme is relating your self to fish, & I find this so intriguing, & here it is again, presenting itself. I'm curious about this. Is there are reason? Is it just a natural simulation? I'd love to know.

    "(with your lovely brine)" is also a great line. Your page is like a gold mine or some archeological dig. I want to treasure each poem, but also handle them with care.
    | Posted on 2011-02-10 00:00:00 | by Santi | [ Reply to This ]

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