Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Crocusesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Charlie Poppins
    ASL Info:    22, female, England
    Elite Ratio:    3.03 - 71/85/65
    Words: 185
    Class/Type: Misc/Longing
    Total Views: 357
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1059



    Description:
       Something from the wake of it all, that has little meaning anymore.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCrocusesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Working to the sunset, keeping my pace steady as she goes,
    Turned out that when the air got hot, the words could finally flow.
    It's been a little while since a new toothbrush sat on my shelf
    Not that I've thrown your old one away.
    Spring blooms came and went,
    With summer, a new scent weighs down upon my mattress,
    And yet all I see is crocuses.

    He blooms like a plumpened rose,
    His kiss so full of heavy promise,
    But all I long for is the cool caress of spring time chill,
    Sweet lavender sweet nothings,
    That meant more than this ever will.
    Bring to me those crocuses, those crocuses we loved.
    Sing to me of crocuses, those crocuses that watched.
    Come back to me as they do each spring, come back to me my love.

    Each morning I wake to caress him thorns and all,
    Succulent and lustrous, king of all hearts as I recall,
    Funny how I still think back each sunrise to the prince I had before.





    Submitted on 2011-02-07 19:42:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i loved it, honestly i love how you compare them both to flowers and the seasons. it all fits perfectly. good write
    | Posted on 2011-02-08 00:00:00 | by scardnscared | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    189289

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    A Drink written by jjd
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Incubus written by monad
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    This written by Chelebel
    Song written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry