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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Oak and the Honeysuckledots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ShiveringFire
    Elite Ratio:    4.9 - 328/84/22
    Words: 195
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 619
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1041



    Description:
       ofcourse, it is not merely about some flowers but why let insignificant things injure fulfilling relationship


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Oak and the Honeysuckledots
    -------------------------------------------


    (I have no idea how to go near him. He is wide awake beneath his closed eyes but let me pretend for a while that he is asleep.)

    All right dear, I know you are very angry because the storm shattered the honeysuckles you had planted for me. And I could not protect them and they are now all muddy and dead and half buried but get up man and see some oaks have fallen too. IT WAS A STORM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How can you leave me alone and still locked inside our dreams.

    Now I am getting angry too,,,, but wait this is not anger, this is pain, a lot of pain…. So it means you are hurting too…. okay, in love, ache looks like anger, fine.

    I can feel what you are feeling… I am beside you listening to your breathing silence. This pain means nothing as long as you and me are together. You know, in this whole tumult an oak and a little honeysuckle have survived completely unscathed. While I sit by you pretending to write something you can enjoy the little game of guessing who are they!




    Submitted on 2011-03-16 11:28:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I wish I could write with such feeling and depth...
    | Posted on 2011-03-29 00:00:00 | by ShadowsnLights | [ Reply to This ]
      ok, i love how you write. and this is why... you write as if in a normal conversation, and then you drop a completed gem out of NOWHERE like this one ----> " in love, ache looks like anger"...

    WHAT?! where in the world??!, what in the devil??!!!... you have SKILLZ.. i love that! it's like you have it, but you aren't giving it all away at the same time..

    the best part about this writing style is this, you make one stop completely in mid-sentence and go back and re-read, in-depth, what is actually being said.. i love it. Your a show-stopper.
    | Posted on 2011-03-20 00:00:00 | by Oracle | [ Reply to This ]
      ...

    I like this, you have a good way of making the point clear and brings the reader directly into the "lair" where the story takes place.

    Thumbs up ;-)


    -Kwanying-
    | Posted on 2011-03-17 00:00:00 | by Kwanying | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice flow to this piece, very clear portrayal.

    Nice write.

    Marco
    | Posted on 2011-03-16 00:00:00 | by Latin King | [ Reply to This ]
      What a clever write this is. Very good analogy, and it all made perfect sense to me.

    Frank.
    | Posted on 2011-03-16 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]


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