Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

I Do


Author: trynfinity
ASL Info:    38/f/California
Elite Ratio:    4.43 - 149 /145 /91
Words: 94
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 988
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 669



Description:


A Vow


I Do



Isaid I do
And took a vow.
Good times bad
For then and now.
I made a promise
And it was real.
Through it all
It's what I feel.
I don't expect
The fairytale life.
And I like being
Simply your wife.
I know we'll argue
We'll have our fights.
But when all is done
In your arms it's right.
I'm not perfect
I'll admit when I'm wrong.
Stand my ground
Be with you strong.
But always forever
My heart stands true.
A promise i'll keep
Cause forever I do.
3/2/2011




Submitted on 2011-04-02 05:36:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  that is so great. well-written piece of art with beautiful music.
You successed to describe how it goes when you truelly love someone.
And your piece is from now a favourite of mine.
I really liked this part most:

And I like being
Simply your wife.
I know we'll argue
We'll have our fights.
But when all is done
In your arms it's right.


Great job
| Posted on 2011-04-03 00:00:00 | by Khaled AbdAllah | [ Reply to This ]
  i read this and think...wow, this speaker really means it...

hopefully, i say, in the next breath...

been there on this one..the promises, to be there no matter what...

only on the other side...the promise was flimsy--

and when the hard times came, the disagreements, the rough patches...

the words lost their meaning and ...left me wishing both sides had meant it.

i like the first two words being fused...whether that was intended or not---it sets the tone for the poem...

two people making a vow..and how refreshing it would be for both to mean it...

this just pretty much says it...a very up front, here it is , piece...

but i like...
"i'll admit when i'm wrong, but stand my ground"

i will walk beside you, not behind or in front of....

jacob
| Posted on 2011-04-02 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



190239