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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Darknessdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Forthwind
    ASL Info:    29/male/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    0.8 - 0/2/7
    Words: 140
    Class/Type: Poetry/Broken
    Total Views: 484
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 716



    Description:
       Too much for words...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDarknessdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Darkness befalls me like a fog in the night, the crickets chirp, the wind blows, the houses creak, and the moonlight dims. I look up and all I see is darkness. not a single star in the sky....not even a glint of light. my soul takes form of that which has oppressed me, in such a way as to alter my very being. once I was happy and full of light. the laughter, the smiles, the jokes, the love...all those things have been washed away to nothing more than a memoir of time. I reach for it time and time again only to come back empty handed. I feel helpless as though drifting in time like a clock who's gear have become broken and cannot do what it was created to do.....so is the eternity for which I am




    Submitted on 2011-04-04 00:12:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow.
    I have not read a good write in a very long time, and you just got a bullseye!

    "Darkness befalls me like a fog in the night, the crickets chirp, the wind blows, the houses creak, and the moonlight dims."
    I can just taste it. the mellow air just came in through my window!

    " I look up and all I see is darkness. not a single star in the sky....not even a glint of light. "

    I would put it I look up and darkness is all i see.
    just my preference

    "my soul takes form of that which has oppressed me, in such a way as to alter my very being."

    My soul has taken that very form which has so [horribly] (place intense adjective here) oppressed me

    "I reach for it time and time again only to come back empty handed. "
    Ive felt this way before....

    "I feel helpless as though drifting in time like a clock who's gear have become broken and cannot do what it was created to do....."

    whose gear has become..

    "so is the eternity for which I am"

    Amazing write once again. you dont have to listen to my tweaking but just trying to help out
    | Posted on 2011-04-04 00:00:00 | by BusterLILblock | [ Reply to This ]

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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