Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: i run marathonsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Someones Epiphany
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 4454/2106/161
    Words: 97
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 667
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 751



    Description:
       okay... so i only run half marathons but that doesnt sound remotely as poetic haha. but i have taken up running to distract myself from the longing... hopefully we can be together for ever soon and i can give this running gig up haha!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsi run marathonsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    i run marathons
    without you

    the thud of my feet
    on the pavement
    the thud of my heart
    interacting with my lungs
    the rhythm of my
    arms and legs
    flailing as they may

    distracts me
    from not having you

    some jest
    i'm ethiopian now
    running long distance
    without thought
    but they are wrong
    there is always thoughts

    you you you

    i run marathons
    without you
    slowly counting down
    each volatile day
    until i find myself
    running
    thud thud
    rhythm flailing
    into your arms
    once more.




    Submitted on 2011-04-04 06:13:00     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      And here we are again, with me reading you and wondering how you know how I feel. I too run as a distraction. Though my running is more of a symbol of running away instead of running towards something.

    my motto this year seems to be I Run To Keep From Running Away.

    Thank you for yet another connection :)

    Tc
    | Posted on 2012-08-20 00:00:00 | by MmR | [ Reply to This ]
      
    Running is a great symbol of endurance, & I think that's what you've come up with here, your own personal will to get to your destination. Staying steady, determined, focused. But there is also that "without you" that lends a sweetness & longing to the poem, which gives us a the firm realization that it is the "you" that's at the heart of the running.

    & I really like the aspect of flailing. It brings to mind an imperfect runner, who is still be fully loved. & that's all we want, is to be fully loved.

    Makes me want to sorta cheer you on & watch you cross the finish line. :)
    | Posted on 2011-04-04 00:00:00 | by Santi | [ Reply to This ]
      it's almost like when we lost someone to death...we go through activities, mechanically, to take our mind off the pain we are feeling...

    running is like that, can do that...this time it is separation from a significant other...

    loneliness is my marathon...i am running with only the thought of you beside me...
    and eventually i am so in tune with the sound of my steps...i tune the thought of you ---eventually i am not just running but running towards you and the day we will be together again..it is the home stretch, and you are my home.


    "i'm ethiopian now" great line...

    i picture the long distance runner...running as if it is taking no toll whatsoever on him or her...but here...the toll is on the heart.

    i like the short, concise lines in this..they are like the strides of a runner...well paced.

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-04-04 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    190279

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Love written by saartha
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Cover written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Angel Eyes written by poetotoe
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    Dream written by closetpoet
    The World written by jjd
    prison written by ShyOne
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Journey written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry