Tormented day after day with your memory,Being reminded that your no longer in this world and I have to push my self through each day without you, It makes me so angry, You were the person who made things easier for me when the were rough, When I thought life was no longer worth living it was you who told me that there was always something to live for, Now your gone, So what is my reason now? How do I continue to push through each day? How do I find something worth living for? Everyone around me seems so happy and living like there is not a care in the world, I want to live like that, I just struggle with being happiness, I have plenty to be happy for, I just cant seem to allow those to take over the constant reminder that your gone, I know your in a better place, I know your watching me,So why are you not helping me cope? Why Can I no longer feel you as close as you once were, I feel as if you pushed me away, As if something or someone more important as taken my place, All I want to do is give up and say goodbye to everything that I know and Love, But I know that is the last thing you would ever begin to allow me to say or do,Maybe I just need to shed a little more blood? I just want out of this state of mind but the one man I ran to and poured everything out to is nothing but ashes and there is nothing I can do to bring him back so forever in this tortured state till its my turn to go.