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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Bent that Waydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Blue Monk
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 1556/457/118
    Words: 224
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 771
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1445



    Description:
       I have always kept my boots in service for too long.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBent that Waydots
    -------------------------------------------


    If taking notes, our paths have crossed
    and happenstance directs our way
    onward yet past polite nod
    acknowledgements humanity
    yet silence holds its burden fast
    to each his own in contemplay
    a mindful search of sensory
    is this a one who carries God?

    Which vessel fit for kingdoms come
    which current carries beyond sight
    past judgement day or even night
    who knows the grail that He did choose
    silence before the storm...

    Take kind regard of other's shoes
    and note the sole that holds the hole
    you see some have a special bent
    though rates of ware may vary much
    volumes are spoke of where it went
    where it was worn, where it was rent
    of traction lost to fall away

    Witness the heals that follow up
    yet left alone these always fail
    past tears of joy such never change
    worn ever in a special way
    that fights the man with every step
    and leads the weary sole to path
    an untrod one that's just begun

    So stranger if you call me that
    I'll smile and nod and tip my hat
    and cry inside to know the truth
    our blood is one fired by the Son
    and tempered by the Three in One
    towards Magnum Opus no one knows
    forever yet kept folded tight
    as yet another lover's note




    Submitted on 2011-04-08 18:05:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Many feet, many paths; one destination. And loads of worn out shoes along the way.
    I really like the way you used double-edged words, it enhances the natural mysterious/mystic feel to the poem.
    Very nicely done, Lloyd!
    | Posted on 2011-04-25 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      It is disquieting.

    Like you are saying we must look back to look forward... and i deeply felt the disloction, the separation, the utter fragmentation of the soul. i liked its slow movement and layered subtlities...

    that lovers note folded tight is perhaps a great missed opportunity... this is something we know and we do not know.
    | Posted on 2011-04-09 00:00:00 | by ShiveringFire | [ Reply to This ]
      okay i know i tend to go on...but damn "some have a special bent"

    that line just keeps going through my head...

    and it also makes me smile...i am from NY and my cousin from Jersey used to always say "we're going to get bent" in his conotation bent meant trouble...i like the way you use it here...a good thing...meaning more of a leaning...in a religious sense, leaning toward good...

    i so like that line...
    | Posted on 2011-04-09 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a wonderful piece. truly enjoyable to read. great word play and internal rhythm. even though you don't come right out and use the pun "soul", i can't help thinking about it alongside of your use of "sole".... we are all the same "souls", no one's soul being above the next person's....when a piece puts a pun into the mind of the reader without it actually being written there, the poet has accomplished something rare and beautiful. bravo!
    | Posted on 2011-04-09 00:00:00 | by rubie | [ Reply to This ]
      "its burdens"

    and "wear" rather than "ware" unless you meant the double meaning...which actually would be a nice irony here...

    but "the sole that holds the hole"

    we judge people so easily...but haven't walked a mile in their shoes, or even a few inches...

    and we don't know what caused the holes in their lives...or caused them to walk where they are walking...

    we profess to have God in our souls...but treat people in a way which suggests the exact opposite....

    the last stanza leads me to the conclusion..we are all the same in his eyes...none better than another...and we should remember that when we decide to judge if one is worthy of our friendship...or love...

    we all walk paths..and wear out shoes...and all have our holes...

    so are we really strangers? maybe not.


    nice write...i like the analogy i see here...muchly.


    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-04-08 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


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