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we are (disconnected)

Author: Someones Epiphany
Elite Ratio:    8 - 4454 /2107 /161
Words: 107
Class/Type: Poetry /Longing
Total Views: 1673
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 793


i am apples you are tangerines
different fruit from the same tree

we are (disconnected)

i am a disconnected
turning, turning, turning
i know there is a reason
for this
but it all seems so mundane

wake up get dressed eat breakfast go to work eat lunch go home eat dinner excersize shower sleep

repeat repeat repeat

you are a disconnected
turning turning turning
you know there is a reason
for this
but it all seems so mundane

wake up get dressed eat breakfast see family eat food catch taxis play basketball shower sleep

repeat repeat repeat

we are (disconnected)
in two weeks wel will find
function, completion


Submitted on 2011-04-11 04:44:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  i never thought i would enjoy repetition so much!.. and the final stanza is truly unique in its hope, its self-assuredness, its finality. this feels like being in a long distance relationship, and I can totally relate. also thumbs up on the original use of (), it genuinely emphasizes the general awkward feeling of 'disconnectedness'.
| Posted on 2012-05-09 00:00:00 | by expiring_touch | [ Reply to This ]
  Very nice piece. The imagery, and feeling are powerful here. We all live mundane lives for a time before we find that meaning we search for, but you must always remember that even the mundane can be beautiful.

| Posted on 2012-01-08 00:00:00 | by sageeriol | [ Reply to This ]
  disconnected becomes connected...

this reminds me of a lily tomlin quote...she said they should take two New Yorkers who are walking down the street talking to themselves and pair them up. That way they would look like they are talking to each other.

we get so caught up in our own lives, sometimes it is hard to be together with another...takes effort, compromise, adaption..but i think you guys are doing that...

and soon...the mundane will feel fun because you will be doing it together.

| Posted on 2011-04-11 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

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