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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Aura Queen dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: monad
    ASL Info:    64/M/California
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 1082/406/116
    Words: 445
    Class/Type: Prose/Alone
    Total Views: 1078
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1471



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAura Queen dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Lonely time the silent partner my shroud of light untouched ? Stone horse caravan in flight beckons to your claw , to sail the truth of force untold beyond the gaping maw .

    The trees a mountainous mirage , the well of life , the soldier's strife . Their patterns form a vast collage , oming beckoning call of life . Like the drips concentric circles they sing a mighty tune , of the force that has survived the tide to look upon the moon .

    A camel's hump with head and trail the universal drone . We track across the sea of time like unicorns we hone . Only to become ourselves as we forge into our home .

    Tomorrow is only yesterday beyond the here and now . We all must strive within ourselves to make the tortoise paw . To stand beside the endless river and be what we can be , until we finally become what we all need to be . Introspect the bottomless key , to stand an island in the sea .

    Pieces of jade in a sun bowl , the purpled crystal queen . The fragments of forever continue with the dream . Islands in the sun , speaking just for fun , of what it is that out survives the truth that hasn't come .

    God bless the child that has its own , gladiator that .




    Submitted on 2011-04-23 02:02:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Had to put my two cents in.

    Lonely time the silent partner
    my shroud of light untouched?
    Stone horse caravan in flight
    beckons to your claw
    to sail the truth of force untold
    beyond the gaping maw.

    The trees stand on a mountainous
    mirage. The well of life, the soldier's duty.
    These patterns form a vast collage
    in the all beckoning call of life.

    Like the drips concentric circles
    they sing a mighty tune.
    A song of force that has survived the tide
    to look upon the moon.

    A camel's hump or a bump we hump
    while headed up the trail.
    Our tale subsumed in universal drone.
    We track
    across the sea of time
    like unicorns our horn we hone.
    Only to become ourselves
    as we forge into our home.

    Tomorrow is only yesterday
    beyond the here and now.
    We all must strive within ourselves
    to make the tortoise paw.
    We stand beside the endless river.
    There to be what we can be. Until
    we finally become what we are meant to be.

    Introspect the bottomless key, to stand
    an island in the sea.

    Pieces of jade in a sun bowl
    the purpled crystal queen
    are fragments of forever
    that continue with the dream.

    Islands in the sun
    speaking just for fun
    of what it is that out survives
    truth that hasn't come .

    God bless the child
    that has his own
    gladiator hat.

    | Posted on 2011-09-17 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      this one i LOVE dude, it's universal, it's hopeful and it describes people and how our imaginations works so well. but anyhow i found this one to be awesome. sort of a soothing ahhhh compared to the head aching argh from all the allite-puzzles. but yeah i hope this one was fun to write.
    | Posted on 2011-04-27 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]
      Thrilling!

    This Aura queen seems to be a meditative shaman being praised and worshipped by a veteran warrior or the survivor of a massacre: force that has survived the tide to look upon the moon .


    i loved the images as they all intermingled in my mind... the silent pebbles beneath the gushing river became the jade in the crystel bowl.


    it is like a dream keeping the pieces of reality together.
    | Posted on 2011-04-26 00:00:00 | by ShiveringFire | [ Reply to This ]
      This was quite interesting....and accessible.
    I'm not going to say I understood everything you were trying to say, but I enjoyed the mystic feel overall.

    "The trees a mountainous mirage , the well of life , the soldier's strife . Their patterns form a vast collage , oming beckoning call of life . Like the drips concentric circles they sing a mighty tune , of the force that has survived the tide to look upon the moon . "

    This stanza brings gravity to mind...that force over tides moon...rippling its effect over space in concentric circles. (oming? coming?)

    "Tomorrow is only yesterday beyond the here and now . We all must strive within ourselves to make the tortoise paw . To stand beside the endless river and be what we can be , until we finally become what we all need to be . Introspect the bottomless key , to stand an island in the sea ."

    This is awesome! The rhyme is just right... and the sentiments are inspiring. I wonder what the tortoise paw is, though....

    "Pieces of jade in a sun bowl , the purpled crystal queen . The fragments of forever continue with the dream . Islands in the sun , speaking just for fun , of what it is that out survives the truth that hasn't come . "

    This is my favorite stanza, although I dont grasp the metaphor...
    jade in a sun bowl, and a purpled queen...the image is bright, precious, and somehow enlivening.
    Purple as a verb is intriguing....I like that a bunch.

    Thanks for sharing these words! I've enjoyed reading and reflecting on them.

    | Posted on 2011-04-26 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      This sets up a melodramatic mood wherein I envision a an angular looking male character reciting these words with a theater quality voice which is pointedly directed to the listener with the conspiratorial flair of secrets being told. This would account for "aura" while the ending hints of magic. The "queen" could stand more development if she's to be the object here. Purple is good, crystal is trite but that's my biased opinion.
    | Posted on 2011-04-23 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      life is a journey over mountains, deserts, water etc. not literally but figuratively...as we search for the truth of who we are....

    many of us rush that journey...we are like the hare racing the tortoise...but we need to slow down and just let life happen..we will end up where we need to be...the tortoise did...

    i like the last part of this...almost cynical but not quite...kind of like don't take ourselves so seriously...people do that too much and then don't ever enjoy life at all...it becomes a trek, a necessity to cover ground..instead of an enjoyable journey like it should be...

    i like the ease of language in this...so readable and smooth...i was caught up in the idea i had while reading it....not fighting with the phrasing at all...a comfortable journey...thank you.

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-04-23 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


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