Plume by Clayman

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Submission Name: Plume dots

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Author:	Clayman
ASL Info:	28 - getting late
Elite Ratio:	6.34 - 609/327/167
Words:	70

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	603
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	543

Description:

Plume

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I won't kill you
because you're not beautiful.
I won't kill you
because you're not whole.
I have been killing you
since you touched my soul.
I have been killing you
since you shunned all control.

My heart balloons
but there is no string.
Cast me over volcanos,
just a forgotten skin..

Faster, faster blowing just..
lonely sailor on tomorrow's gust.

-Svw

Submitted on 2011-06-18 17:11:15 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
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||| Comments |||
Wow! This was a powerful lyric and I could imagine a whole song playing in my head!

Great! Smiles to Share ;-)
| Posted on 2011-06-20 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
my heart has gotten away from me...you are the volcano..and as i pass over you i will either pass over you or explode from your heat, and from my wanting you.
i am like a lost ship now....aimlessly wandering in the gusts...

i think she is beautiful and i think she is whole..but i think the speaker still tried to change her to suit his wants...we tend to do that....and when we do..that person breaks away...

"if you love something let it go..maybe it will come back?" and maybe we will still be flying...hopefully we won't have been sucked into a volcano of regrets...
perhaps our ship may find peaceful waters.

jacob
| Posted on 2011-06-18 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

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9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

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Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.