Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Watch Closelydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BlazeFlamme
    ASL Info:    22/m/TX
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 23/160/138
    Words: 128
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 635
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 936



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWatch Closelydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Watch Closely

    I may turn away
    And play pretend
    When I know that you have
    No hand to lend

    You don't see me
    All the while you stare
    You're searching for someone
    I've always been there

    Someone to trust
    Someone who's true
    Someone who'd give
    His whole world for you

    If you'd settle your eyes
    Allow focus to stay
    Your search would then end
    I'm here everyday

    It's not very hard
    To fall head over heels
    With fire and passion
    From how your love feels

    I'll never betray
    I'll never hold back
    I'll love you always
    I promise you that

    So throughout your search
    For a love that is true
    And you're looking through me
    Know my eyes are on you




    Submitted on 2011-06-20 14:34:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Such a familiar theme--the desire to be noticed by the object of one's desire. As Jacob said, a nice straightforward write.~C
    | Posted on 2011-06-20 00:00:00 | by ponykeeper | [ Reply to This ]
      i like the honesty of this piece...and in its simplicity, it reads smoothly and the sentiment lies bare...pretty straightforward...but a nice love poem...it is a style...and you do this one well...

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-06-20 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    191428

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    One Day written by WriteSomething
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    untitled written by Chelebel
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Fasade written by jackz
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Linger written by saartha
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Giving written by jjd

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry