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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: This Mourningdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 159
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 406
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 987



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThis Mourningdots
    -------------------------------------------


    In the car
    waiting on traffic clearrings on two lanes of highway

    Also the time is an issue
    Nearly late for work

    The cars do not seem to be relenting any,
    and I start to feel very sorry for myself

    And then
    they break

    Down the road, like my gas light says, I have to pull over and get some gas

    Pulling out again
    Guy cuts me off
    come on come on come
    gooooo

    on the move again
    tensing up
    feeling for vibrations that could mean any of my tires are flat
    nothing so far

    to my right
    the sky is black
    the clouds are spreading out
    the wind picks up
    rain comes down on half my winsheild

    I turn left
    go just a little way
    Red light
    Train

    Funny I have never seen a train here
    all this time I thought it was a historical site





    Submitted on 2011-06-28 15:54:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This mourning...
    This mourning of mine will never go away.
    As we stand frozen on a kiss
    In this hyaline coffin, floating in mid-air
    And the only feeling being
    That this mourning
    This mourning will never go away.

    :)

    See? You inspired me to write something. You must be doing a good job as I haven't written anything in years..
    | Posted on 2011-06-30 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]
      I often have anxiety issues when going to work. For me, this seems to capture those moments well.

    Every little thing irritates, notice and worry about things that do not warrent such attention.

    If this is indeed metaphorical it is well crafted. Never seen the drive to work used as a metaphor. Creative.
    | Posted on 2011-06-30 00:00:00 | by snacky fish | [ Reply to This ]
      A metaphor for the state of your mind now, eh? Traffic can be painful and block paths and sometimes there is no getting around it - especially when you are late for something . . . Murphy's Law I suppose. But it always clears and it is such a cool feeling when it does. You refuel then keep going. And the guy who cuts you off - could be taken many ways. Vibrations - your gut, your heart. Rain on half your windshield . . . only part of your life seems muggy? You turn to avoid the dark sky. Then suddenly when you feel like you're in familiar territory you see a train on what you thought were some old tracks. Preserved for "historical" reasons, but it's still running and it kind of takes you somewhere else . . . I liked it, very cool.
    | Posted on 2011-06-28 00:00:00 | by Solomon Disease | [ Reply to This ]


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