Description: I'd had this idea in mind for a long time but only now have I been able to put it down.
What I want to express here is not that I hate it but that I loathe watching others overdoing it.
Thanks for stopping by.
PS: I know some of my writes are extremely personal and they may not be fathomed only because of it. I've written something on my journal regarding what was crossing my mind by the time I wrote this. So if you wish or care enough just take a quick look at it after reading.
Status update: Irina is.... writing a status update about nothing.
That's pretty much what every update is about from people I know. I have facebook but not twitter. Facebook is more of my address book since I know people from other places. Other than that, I have no care in the world for it. I don't care about people's tweets. Don't have one. Don't read any.
Good subject. And amazing Title. Loved it.
I prefered reading your journal than this. I think you've restricted yourself too much and didn't express enough. There's a passion missing. Don't get me wrong, the writing in itself is good and the ideas are there. It's just missing that magic. I don't see it in this piece. But I do see it in your journal.
Hmmm, this I quite like - or the idea of it. I would like to comment on the form of it though:
To tighten it up a bit, I would try to work on the application of the more abstract metaphors of eruption and the more literal. Trying to break them up into lines of two abstract paralleled with two literal as in:
It resembles tacky fame
And echoes the sheer urge to be spoken
Just as magma
Wants to be so desperately released.
Then the break of form in the last four lines would come much better together as they are 'reversed' in order.
The work is then to be done on the first four lines, which could then be worked into two couples (adding the parallel to the vulcano) or reducing it by removing one of the metaphors - I do quite like the two metaphors though and would like to see them both in the text :-)
Anywho, just my reading - thanks for some great ideas in fine packing :-)