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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Itís Likedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: layDsayD
    ASL Info:    29/f/florida
    Elite Ratio:    3.16 - 264/243/147
    Words: 65
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 634
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 397



    Description:
       


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    dotsItís Likedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Feels like madness
    Sadness kissing hate
    Like a love burn
    A hate dance
    Like going round and round
    Carousel of pain
    Pretty painted faces
    Distorted clowns
    Itís ok
    Itís ok
    Pat he head
    She likes it
    Like a secret
    Silently screaming
    A boring psych class video
    Like Iím the star




    Submitted on 2011-07-11 18:55:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I want to read the specifics about this. What feels like madness? Get into that. Write a poem specific to that madness. Dig in. I feel like this poem is kind of vague.
    | Posted on 2013-08-24 00:00:00 | by lolaxelmo | [ Reply to This ]
      did you mean "pat her head'?

    that's how i read that line...this poem really twists...the love burning, the hate dance, the clowns who pretend to be happy...that was all okay...it flowed nicely but the last part just snapped me to...jumped out and bit me in the poetic mind. "like a secret/ silently screaming'a boring psych class video/like i'm the star"

    those are such keepers...nice sarcasm...the speaker almost making fun of herself...yeah i'm the star...but maybe like marilyn monroe..a very troubled star.

    i really like this piece

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-07-11 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


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