[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Mr. Brittle Bones & Ms. Head Shotdots

    Author: snacky fish
    ASL Info:    31/male/FL
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 377/472/111
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 557
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 723

       Another Mr. Brittle Bones poem. Just a character I drempt up and write about once in a while.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMr. Brittle Bones & Ms. Head Shotdots

    Insidious and morose
    Is Mr. Brittle Bones bitter ghost
    A skeleton once was he
    Able to frown, freak, and flee

    That was until
    His brains took a little spill
    Spattered about and around
    With out a shot or a sound

    Now an apparition like mist
    With out finger or fist
    Too shake or flick
    No bones to clack or click

    It was Ms. Head Shot
    Well armed, deadly, and hot
    One pull of her feather trigger
    She made his head less bigger

    Poor Mr. Brittle Bones's head
    With out it he's quiet and dead
    Yet he still wonders the most
    Could Ms. Head Shot ever love a ghost?

    Submitted on 2011-07-16 17:49:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      "My morbid heart loves this"
    That's a quote from you lol

    I only saw this when I clicked your profile. It's like your poems aren't showing up or something. Weird. I'll check back often, though.
    | Posted on 2011-07-22 00:00:00 | by OneDarkFlame92 | [ Reply to This ]
      Fun and dark, love it. It flows nicely, rolls right off the tongue.
    It lacks defined imagery and is short, but still very well written.

    Keep up the good work and I'll keep reading.

    | Posted on 2011-07-16 00:00:00 | by MinervaBlu | [ Reply to This ]
      reminds me of a line in "the outsiders"

    matt dillon as Dallas said it..."man, that girl hates me...do you think she might like me a little?"

    the love hate relationships we sometimes have...there is love but so much friction we just can't live together...and one or the other of the pair will shoot the other down...blow them away with words...

    end the relationship...

    not literally...but i feel this piece is meant figuratively....nice humor in it.

    | Posted on 2011-07-16 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    The Promise written by annie0888
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Giving written by jjd
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Wavelength written by saartha
    To written by SavedDragon
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Break Up written by WriteSomething




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]