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    dots Submission Name: Tides of Love & Tragedydots

    Author: HisNameIsNoMore
    ASL Info:    28 - Male - Ohio
    Elite Ratio:    3.09 - 75/182/213
    Words: 185
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 653
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1122

       Wrote it on a whim.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTides of Love & Tragedydots

    Once I had believed in a thought called love,
    Said to be of something worth thinking of,
    Yet I feel it even through my subtle blunders,
    As I respite a looming misery I begun to wonder.
    Was it all a dream?
    Searching for your loving catharsis,
    What can it mean?
    I'm just lonely in this parody of farces.

    I feel her, my muse waiting in the weeds.
    Oh how it just eludes me,
    Alas no longer can I believe,
    That you are perfect- Waiting for me...

    Tomorrow had come at last; I only wished for rain,
    Sought out to pray that all the world felt this pain,
    And I know you reap what you sow-
    Yet I cannot see the comedy of this show.

    Tragedy have you ever smiled?
    Have you not too been enchanted by her passion and her guile.
    Or was it simply a notion?
    Somewhere you lost yourself deep with in that ocean,
    Searching for shore-
    Always wanting her more and more.

    Beseech my fear this fate; for me
    Perhaps I will too be forever lost at sea.

    Submitted on 2011-07-30 11:34:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      For me this perspective is all I really have a problem with. My own ideas of love and tradgedy and what my reaction to them are just not this. I think you have style, you definately have a gift for writing, but this didn't capture me as I hoped it would.

    The speaker talks about love as such a high ideal and I personally respect the imperfection, the work, the saying I am sorry and the forgiving, the overcoming, the RAW humanity.

    I did like the reap what you sow line. I think it is one of my favorite principles because of how true it is and how quick it is to show itself when you aren't looking.

    THanks for sharing.
    | Posted on 2011-08-11 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like the line about the "parody of farces"

    i would love to see you create something around that line...i just feel that most of this piece has imagery and wording that i have seen before in other pieces, too often...would like to see fresher wording and word play...

    something stemming from that line might work very well...

    could just be me...but just thoughts

    | Posted on 2011-07-30 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

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