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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: my silent heart dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: afra
    ASL Info:    15/female/canada
    Elite Ratio:    1.33 - 4/9/19
    Words: 95
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 594
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 555



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsmy silent heart dots
    -------------------------------------------


    my silent heart bleeds tears ,
    my silent is in fears ,

    it is not that much strong ,
    it won't last without your love long ,

    my silent gets hurt ,
    but i think my heart isn't worth ,

    my silent heart expects ,
    but mostly gets rejects ,

    my silent heart is sad ,
    but no one feels bad ,

    my silent heart wishes deep ,
    it also dreams when i sleep ,

    my silent heart is easily taken ,
    but given back when its broken ,




    Submitted on 2011-08-04 07:35:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The rhyme seems a bit forced. I am also guilty of this I think. The premise is good but it comes off a little flat and cliché. It reads stiff and I was unable to get into it at the level in which the words pour from. But than again the piece is wholly yours so it only matters how you feel about it. I will read some more of your stuff.
    | Posted on 2011-08-07 00:00:00 | by malcolmknight | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this poem was good .....well i also have that silent heart
    daniol
    | Posted on 2011-08-04 00:00:00 | by rockhard15 | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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