[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Our Native Birth, Our Given Rightdots

    Author: ladydeathstrike
    ASL Info:    27/F/Chicago
    Elite Ratio:    5.27 - 259/284/94
    Words: 69
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 445
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 435


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOur Native Birth, Our Given Rightdots

    swaddled in the blanket of birth,
    we arrive in this world with a burder of a thousand lives.

    we are nursed with the milk of a million cries,
    devouring what we do not have,
    we yearn for what is near and far.

    ghost children of
    fragments of incomplete lives.

    we are sinners,
    criminals with innocence.

    we are the dead alive.

    Submitted on 2011-09-05 01:26:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      left to hear the stripped stench of burden burried under hunger i's and fell through blues of appocolyse. we are miscollections of adams mistakes and the ego of god complex bishops trip stripped and miss-hipped just like everything else could say it is. bi-products of broken language sets and intuitive misnomers of what we think the language mess means. average jerks without no shame we hold our hearts to imaginary flames like zombies starving for hunger and oxy morons drowning in the bull spit of misread lyric. we are the filter phase.
    | Posted on 2011-09-05 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]
      i like this...i think in the second line you meant "burden"?

    we are criminals with innocence...yes, rather than the other way around..innocents with the criminal streak in us..
    born to want more than we have...always reaching for that which we haven't got...

    gluttonous...hoarders, who just accumulate...because somehow we feel incomplete...always incomplete...how sad that is....all that pressure when we are born...why can't we be born satisfied with whom we are and with what we have...and just enjoy life...

    always amassing things...we just do that...we need..

    again i love the sheryl crow quote.

    "it's not needing what you want, it's wanting what you've got"

    i just really get into this piece...such good writing.

    | Posted on 2011-09-05 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      I have often thought that , genetically speaking , I am the reflections of a thousand lonely burials . That likewise I have an innate urge to believe that I have a conception of the infinite . After all I lived here and psychic clarity gives me visions , even of things I haven't experienced . Conversely I don't consider this primal urge to be sin , although I guess perhaps I don't have everybody's permission to observe , or worse lay claim to my observations . Perhaps this is why babies cry . Because there validity gets denied . Conversely again imagination opens even more doors than actually exist , so maybe it's the mystery that keeps us alive rather than the cold hard facts . Further , if this primal urge is actually our taubla rasa state what a sin of a hideous apparition it would be if we all , of mask , put on our cloaking devises and denied the literalities of our exsistence . Almost enough to give you a nightmare huh ? Could even cause alzheimer's . This is the sin . Not the innocence of psychic clarity's conception wether that seems childlike or not .

    | Posted on 2011-09-05 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Bond written by saartha
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]