[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Gardeningdots

    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 81
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1057
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 496


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    A constant and fragile song that leaves me waiting
    I am here
    standing here
    planting my sorrows and faith and mixed seed bags like a very diligent gardener
    of feeling
    of heart
    of platueas and valleys and the wind that whispers through the delicate finger prints of the trees
    awake and groaning and satisfied until I am too clumsy to recignize my own love heart song
    aspiring to see the glistening tears of a touched earth in the morning dew

    Submitted on 2011-09-08 09:17:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This is an intimate piece of writing, soulful and definitive, expressive of both the positive and negative aspects of life...As writing should, of course...

    A garden seems a suitable environment for relinquishing and recapturing the significance of any particular life, of reestablishing joy and purpose. The final line speaks volumes, as I read and reread it:

    "aspiring to see the glistening tears of a touched earth in the morning dew"

    Great writing. Thank you for sharing.

    | Posted on 2012-12-31 00:00:00 | by nwproud | [ Reply to This ]
      i really liked how you portray the speaker as someone who is sorting through their life to discover their true self; faith, love, happiness, sorrow, and everything else mixed together. the visual of the garden is outstanding as well, how the "mixed seed bags" could be both the good things and bad in life, but once the rain comes, the flowers bloom, and we step back to look, all together we see the beauty and how it shapes us. absolutely love it.
    | Posted on 2011-12-18 00:00:00 | by gwenn sundala | [ Reply to This ]

    I quite like this piece, but "wind that whispers" might be said in a fresher way, and you misspelled "plateaus" as well.

    through the delicate finger prints of the trees
    awake and groaning and satisfied until I am too clumsy to recignize my own love heart song
    aspiring to see the glistening tears of a touched earth in the morning dew

    That's lovely. I love comparing the dew to tears. This reminds me of haiku due to the theme of nature.

    | Posted on 2011-09-17 00:00:00 | by cuddledumplin | [ Reply to This ]
      life is indeed a garden and we are just gardeners.
    its how we handle our garden that would define us.
    we can leave the garden and everything would die or take care of it and it becomes something beautiful.
    and right now you having a flower sprouting in your garden. it is beautiful.

    | Posted on 2011-09-14 00:00:00 | by w0ords | [ Reply to This ]
      really like the ending...this is a very nicely played metaphor...you make it grow strong as the poem evolves...i like when poets introduce metaphors and then work them throughout the poem

    careful of spelling.."recognize"

    but otherwise...one of my favorites by you...

    a bloom of a poem.

    | Posted on 2011-09-08 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Wavelength written by saartha
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Giving written by jjd
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    To written by SavedDragon
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Push written by JanePlane




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]