[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Empty Shelldots

    Author: ibelikeso
    ASL Info:    27/M/FL
    Elite Ratio:    4.99 - 119/106/24
    Words: 201
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 419
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1117

       Considering where my life is at right now. Overwhelmed with problems that I can do nothing about. I just wait to see what my judgement will be.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEmpty Shelldots

    I am finally done with the man that once was.
    Nothing inside, what I had is now lost.
    Strangled my heart and would not let it beat.
    I gave up on love, accepted life's true defeat.

    I walk as a shell, just hallow inside.
    Live as a man that is neither dead nor alive.
    No reason to laugh or to smile or to cry.
    No guts to plan out the many ways I can die.

    God is not near me, I pushed him away.
    Satan just smiles and lets me continue my ways.
    There is no conscience to tell me what is wrong or right.
    Nothing left to wish for, while I lay awake at night.

    If I had a reason, found a purpose or a voice,
    If I had a different life, a good parent or a choice,
    To have been born in another life or be a different man,
    With answers to the questions, at least a helping hand.

    I have a troubled mind that keeps all my wrongs,
    I misplaced my heart, wonder where it has gone.
    I keep rainy clouds and dark stories to tell,
    Forever alone, as I bid thee farewell.

    Submitted on 2011-09-12 15:40:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      i don't see self-pity in this...i see resignation...

    forlorn feeling...pretty well presented with a chilly flow of words...

    life losing its meaning...the end not something i am afraid of...but i know what comes after won't be good..i don't deserve good.

    i like this piece
    | Posted on 2011-09-12 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      Pretty good phrasing overall. Nothing spectacular, but who am I to judge?

    I know where you're at right now; I'm close. I've been dealing with a lot of "trapped" feelings, myself. I just feel like nothing will ever work out sometimes and that I'm destined to remain unbloomed.

    Good, relatable write.

    | Posted on 2011-09-12 00:00:00 | by OneDarkFlame92 | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Push written by JanePlane
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Incubus written by monad
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    To written by SavedDragon
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by Chelebel
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Linger written by saartha
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Giving written by jjd
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]