[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Winter Once Againdots

    Author: awastedsky
    ASL Info:    22/f/AZ
    Elite Ratio:    5.1 - 116/151/98
    Words: 150
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 533
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1039

       you know.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWinter Once Againdots

    I left the house with a knit scarf round my neck
    that my best friend from childhood knitted
    my favorite color
    imperfections visible
    but only if you look closely.

    And I realized
    as I traipsed outside
    that exhalations were visible and
    I should probably remember to
    unearth my mittens from their summer hiding place
    in the garage downstairs.

    In Alaska, you learn to smell the snow, just a few weeks before you can see it on the mountains.
    And the weather silences
    even the most persistent cacauphony
    of traffic sounds on the nearby highway
    the traveler
    even with three hundred thousand people imposing their city-esque lifestyles on your backyard.

    And I realized, as I embraced the season change, for better or for worse
    my solemn divide
    this time
    may not just be the cycle of life
    but a representation of
    the beginning of my end.

    Submitted on 2011-09-21 04:53:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      There is so much bitter truth here I find it heartbreaking in a way, so much that makes one unravel from a distance.

    I dislike winter.
    It doesn't snow here, though; it only rains.
    Enough to want to make one shrivel away.

    This is wonderful writing.
    | Posted on 2011-09-21 00:00:00 | by trinityfinger | [ Reply to This ]
      something tells me i should dress for the end...i need to be prepared for my winter....i have fooled myself long enough that summer would be endless, that i may live forever ...but amidst the sounds of the traffic, of people doing their daily routines...the sound of everything moving forward...this will be the last fall for me...there is the scent of mortality, my mortality...

    except for the "knit" and then "knitted" in the first two lines, which feels accidentally redundant...this piece feels so powerful to me...the analogy works quite well...

    especially love the alaska stanza...

    | Posted on 2011-09-21 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Incubus written by monad
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    This written by Chelebel
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]