This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17. It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different. All content will be deleted. Backup anything important. --- Staff
|
|
Take off my face to see this mask of disgrace My under world on fire of these burning desires Take out my eyes The secrets I hide inside All the truth that is written between the lies Take off my face to see the man in me My under world stuck under seas Blackening my tears to hide away I’m superman I’ll fly for one more day. It’s my turn to be superman just for one day Under the moon light I’ll fly away I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky An aurora borea filling every ones eyes It’s my turn to be superman and then I’ll take my leave Leave you all with a message to have something to believe I’m superman I’ll fly for one more day. Your superman Flying away All the tears filling the air From the moments that were never really fare Who was it that saved you after the last second Sweep you out of that fire and took you away I never ask anyone for anything in return For what I am no way anybody could repay Look at my face and the stories it screams All my nightmares and my relived dreams Every day when I fear I’ll drop from the sky Like a bird loosen it’s wings and is now about to die And when I hit the ground my moment breaks And I cant open my eyes when I should awake The people scream from whom I couldn’t save And now I stair at what’s left of them Standing over them while they lay in there grave sometimes I still lay there in wonder Wishing I could have been there a second sooner But I am/ still just a man whom you call superman It’s my turn to be superman just for one day Under the moon light I’ll fly away I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky An aurora borea filling every ones eyes It’s my turn to be superman and then I’ll take my leave Leave you all with a message to have something to believe I’m superman I’ll fly for one more day. Your superman Flying away I stand on the surface of the clouds Wind in my face and a cape off my back Like a flag on my shoulders Bring hope to those in trouble Like rage streaking the sky Holding the pillars that would have crumbled But now I fail you every time you go to expect Saying that I only came just to neglected But I was there giving my life My moment of fear came at the worst of night I lost it all after my best And now I can’t even begin to fight This is the part I open my eyes All those I save begin to turn away I hold out my hand at my weakest But you only stair at me like I’m a living disgrace Then you walk by and kick me in the side Who are you people, all turning aside Giving up what you’ve all been living And now your leaving me dieing on this bloody floor And when your all done kicking me when I’m down I’ll just take off and leave you to wrought in the ground Blackening my tears to hide away I’m superman I’ll fly for one more day. It’s my turn to be superman just for one day Under the moon light I’ll fly away I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky An aurora borea filling every ones eyes It’s my turn to be superman and then I’ll take my leave Leave you all with a message to have something to believe I’m superman I’ll fly for one more day. Your superman Flying away |
i like parts of this but two things really kept me from enjoying it as a whole...the length...i think this could have been half as long and been much more powerful...tighten it up...also be careful of punctuation...contractions take apostrophes...and the misuse of "lay" there is poetic license but in "they lie in their grave" "i still lie there" careful of spellings too...your reader wants to read for content and feeling...not get caught up with editing.. i really see a strong poem developing here with work...the "superman" concept is clever. jacob | Posted on 2011-09-23 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ] | |