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Am I Not Superman


Author: faideddarkness
ASL Info:    28 - Male - Idaho
Elite Ratio:    6.5 - 102 /56 /52
Words: 631
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 1866
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 3786



Description:




Am I Not Superman



Take off my face to see this mask of disgrace
My under world on fire of these burning desires
Take out my eyes
The secrets I hide inside
All the truth that is written between the lies
Take off my face to see the man in me
My under world stuck under seas
Blackening my tears to hide away
I’m superman
I’ll fly for one more day.
It’s my turn to be superman just for one day
Under the moon light I’ll fly away
I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky
An aurora borea filling every ones eyes
It’s my turn to be superman
and then I’ll take my leave
Leave you all with a message
to have something to believe
I’m superman
I’ll fly for one more day.
Your superman
Flying away
All the tears filling the air
From the moments that were never really fare
Who was it that saved you after the last second
Sweep you out of that fire and took you away
I never ask anyone for anything in return
For what I am no way anybody could repay
Look at my face and the stories it screams
All my nightmares and my relived dreams
Every day when I fear I’ll drop from the sky
Like a bird loosen it’s wings and is now about to die
And when I hit the ground my moment breaks
And I cant open my eyes when I should awake
The people scream from whom I couldn’t save
And now I stair at what’s left of them
Standing over them while they lay in there grave
sometimes I still lay there in wonder
Wishing I could have been there a second sooner
But I am/ still just a man
whom you call superman
It’s my turn to be superman just for one day
Under the moon light I’ll fly away
I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky
An aurora borea filling every ones eyes
It’s my turn to be superman
and then I’ll take my leave
Leave you all with a message
to have something to believe
I’m superman
I’ll fly for one more day.
Your superman
Flying away
I stand on the surface of the clouds
Wind in my face and a cape off my back
Like a flag on my shoulders
Bring hope to those in trouble
Like rage streaking the sky
Holding the pillars that would have crumbled
But now I fail you every time you go to expect
Saying that I only came just to neglected
But I was there giving my life
My moment of fear came at the worst of night
I lost it all after my best
And now I can’t even begin to fight
This is the part I open my eyes
All those I save begin to turn away
I hold out my hand at my weakest
But you only stair at me like I’m a living disgrace
Then you walk by and kick me in the side
Who are you people, all turning aside
Giving up what you’ve all been living
And now your leaving me dieing on this bloody floor
And when your all done kicking me when I’m down
I’ll just take off and leave you to wrought in the ground
Blackening my tears to hide away
I’m superman
I’ll fly for one more day.
It’s my turn to be superman just for one day
Under the moon light I’ll fly away
I’ll rain down the stars to brighten the sky
An aurora borea filling every ones eyes
It’s my turn to be superman
and then I’ll take my leave
Leave you all with a message
to have something to believe
I’m superman
I’ll fly for one more day.
Your superman
Flying away




Submitted on 2011-09-22 19:21:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  i like parts of this but two things really kept me from enjoying it as a whole...the length...i think this could have been half as long and been much more powerful...tighten it up...also be careful of punctuation...contractions take apostrophes...and the misuse of "lay"

there is poetic license but in
"they lie in their grave" "i still lie there"

careful of spellings too...your reader wants to read for content and feeling...not get caught up with editing..

i really see a strong poem developing here with work...the "superman" concept is clever.

jacob
| Posted on 2011-09-23 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


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