Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Summer of 2001dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: AbsolutelyLost
    ASL Info:    27/M/India
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 54/41/33
    Words: 156
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 558
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 957



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSummer of 2001dots
    -------------------------------------------


    In the summer of 2001,
    A bright young lad met the one.
    She knew him so well by fall,
    That in winter two became one.
    Halloween and Christmas came and stayed till eternity,
    Until it stroke him that he needs to be.
    And then like a chirping birds ring,
    Came down lightning in spring.

    He then realized how stupid he was for that one,
    That bright young lad in one summer beyond 2001.
    Seasons changed and hearts exchanged,
    But never did he feel so estranged,
    Until one day out of the blue in the crowd,
    His eyes met her until it rained.
    He then took her into his arms and kissed her,
    Like in that Halloween and Christmas before that neverwinter.
    Then seasons changed but emotions remained,
    And the now one got tied by the ring that very spring.
    Needless to say that he never let go the one,
    In any other summer beyond 2001.




    Submitted on 2011-09-23 15:43:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i love the picture of relational struggle in this piece; we have that butterfly feeling at first light, but all to soon we learn it does not last forever and must decide if it is worth fighting for. when we look back in the end, we can see the hard times making us stronger. beautiful portrayal of this.
    | Posted on 2011-12-18 00:00:00 | by gwenn sundala | [ Reply to This ]
      Writing is such a great outlet. Your poem conveys the story of love found and lost. So sad... If I could offer one suggestion it would be to let go the pressure to rhyme. You have a story to tell and that's what matters most in my humble opinion. Thanks for sharing this.... I could relate to the feelings.

    Namaste,

    EW
    | Posted on 2011-09-28 00:00:00 | by EW61 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    192650

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    This written by Chelebel
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ME written by jjd
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    By the bar written by expiring_touch
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Genesis written by saartha
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sunt Mala Quae Libas written by MyPeriodical
    Born of the Mouth written by MyPeriodical
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry