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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Battlesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 71
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 425
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 433



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBattlesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I have become a warrior,
    orchestrating the lights and the magnitudes of gentle breezes
    With my smile I can spear any double headed dragon
    or bloody eyed demon
    raging against forces and principles that reside in the dark, cowards that will not show their true faces, ashamed of how ugly and thick they might be
    But I would carry even those upon my shoulders, the monsters, created by my very disdain




    Submitted on 2011-10-04 08:30:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I quite like this. the fine line of becoming what we loathe. the disarming of our adversaries by our wits/charms...the sincerity of our smiles....their intentions. nice.
    | Posted on 2011-10-22 00:00:00 | by malcolmknight | [ Reply to This ]
      This was very evocative. So many interesting elements! A smile can slay demons yet rage and disdain can create them as well. Perhaps this is battle with one's own demons and the courageous warrior assumes the burden.

    Great write!!

    Steve

    | Posted on 2011-10-13 00:00:00 | by SHRINKSDR | [ Reply to This ]
      This is well done. I enjoyed it a lot. Words like "very" are pretty much dead weight in poetry, so you might want to omit that. Here in the UK, thick also means stupid, and while I'm not sure that's what you had in mind when you wrote it, it is quite an effective image. (Well, some faces do look stupid). I think I'd hyphenate double-headed too.

    Good job,
    Amy

    | Posted on 2011-10-10 00:00:00 | by cuddledumplin | [ Reply to This ]
      I love this:

    "With my smile I can spear any double headed dragon
    or bloody eyed demon"

    I love the idea and the promise that a smile; a winning attitude, is all powerful and can conquer bad things!!

    Delightful!
    | Posted on 2011-10-08 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      Happy day girl!

    I love this piece because it shows the dualITy we encounter and feel here and overcome...

    Thanks with Love & Smiles 2 Share ;-) ;-) ;-)
    | Posted on 2011-10-04 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]


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