Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Autumndots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Wayfarer
    Elite Ratio:    0.52 - 0/1/1
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/Being a Teen
    Total Views: 240
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 571



    Description:
       Yeah... I'm a teenager :P


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAutumndots
    -------------------------------------------


    I raced across the empty land,
    The brilliance slowly passing,
    Following light across the sand,
    The shadows were amassing.
    Their sinful army at my tail,
    With sunset at my head,
    Piercing through the bitter gale,
    And running with the dead,
    My lost and loved surrounded me,
    Their terror cutting deep,
    Condemned to be forever past,
    The safe maternal keep;
    And I, who longed to rest my eyes,
    Was forced to lead them all;
    Horrorstruck at all the cries,
    I ran into the fall.




    Submitted on 2011-11-18 18:42:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      yeah, you are a teenager :P

    well, I will say that I love how you ended this piece, most of all.

    Horror struck at all the cries,
    I ran into the fall.

    Reminds me of Halloween.
    | Posted on 2011-11-20 00:00:00 | by coloredstone | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    193302

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Spill Away like Smoke written by Daniel Barlow
    The House on Tulane written by lukewarm
    Background Music written by lori_tab
    Lens written by saartha
    As We Have It written by MyPeriodical
    Sullen (Pt. 4) written by geekyslacker
    Friday written by kase
    X written by Rhythmal
    Florina written by TheStillSilence
    Neosporin written by Chelebel
    I lost my persona written by Latin King
    Right written by saartha
    тревога written by lebeauvide
    Locket written by SumMalusHaec
    Before You Follow @m.urgatroyd written by BeforeYouFollow
    Dressed in Wool written by Rhythmal
    Elagabalus pt. II written by MyPeriodical
    Teacher written by Angeles
    Fortitude written by Daniel Barlow
    Arya written by Chelebel
    Summer written by Rhythmal
    death and genesis written by Daniel Barlow
    Perception written by hyproglo
    The Struggle written by TeslaKoyal
    Weird Ass Dream written by lori_tab
    Transpositional Interlude written by monad
    Stark written by Chelebel
    In Love written by lori_tab
    Lost Stars written by Janesaddiction
    Carbon Copy written by expiring_touch

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry