Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: In Answer dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: JanePlane
    ASL Info:    125/F/everyplane
    Elite Ratio:    6.77 - 419/434/131
    Words: 111
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 332
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 819



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIn Answer dots
    -------------------------------------------


    In Answer

    when you sit
    and you're so quiet with yourself
    that you hear your breathing
    and you feel it
    and you feel it still.
    a widening.
    an illuminating.

    a grin that comes from deep somewhere
    beneath your vocal chords
    but above your heart
    just above
    like an upwelling of sound

    but the sound never comes
    there is silence
    beneath your breath
    beneath and above everything
    even your heart
    especially your heart

    and that hurt that follows you everywhere
    is healed,

    and that fear is quelled,

    and the time, the day, the lists of reasons
    not to

    don't matter.

    that's love.




    Submitted on 2011-12-04 03:32:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      nice one! delicate and smoothly penetrating.. specially,

    there is silence
    beneath your breath

    these two lines are so breath taking.. so heart touching.. my fav!
    | Posted on 2011-12-07 00:00:00 | by Iram | [ Reply to This ]
      Such a great piece. It's like...I don't know...a roller coaster piece. It just takes you up and drops you.
    I always love poems with conclusions that just make you go...wow.

    “chortle” is not gleeful enough a
    description . . .

    Not sure I like that line. Seems to kind of slow a great pace...for me anyway.

    But I do like how the piece seems to talk directly to the reader.
    "Even your heart
    especially your heart."
    I just like how that's lined up like that.
    Like saying, "no, fuck it, especially your heart."
    That's what it read like in my head, strangely enough.
    and what rubie said, describing love is hard...I think you did a great job

    Matt
    | Posted on 2011-12-05 00:00:00 | by OneDarkFlame92 | [ Reply to This ]
      I've always believed in comfortable silences. Real love never needs words... and it (for me) always giggles. Stupid girlish giggles. I disgust myself in love. I'm such a moron. Luckily, it never happens anymore... I am the bitch in the hat minus the long lean dog, with a shopping bag in one hand and an impatient expression of, "Well, stupid? Where's my fucking drink???"

    God spare me from ever giggling again...
    | Posted on 2011-12-04 00:00:00 | by Runes | [ Reply to This ]
      this is what i would call a "comfortable silence"

    only a smile needed, no reply---the past made peace with...and finally able to love again..not the awkward, protect myself kind of babble needed to keep the real feelings at bay.

    i really like the last third of this..."the reasons not to"

    early in the poem i think you meant "you're"

    but wow...love is defined not by words, but by actions...and sometimes those actions are in a state of inertia because the pain of the past won't let us move forward.
    if i did favorites, this one would be there.


    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-12-04 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      Funny thing....I was just thinking, the other day, how difficult it is to define or describe love. I think my musings might have even been brought on by your piece "Reverie".

    You could use all those clichés...it's a hunger, it fills you up, it's all-consuming, it weakens us, it strengthens us...the list goes on and on yet none of it suffices.

    But you've come damned close here. When nothing else matters, when there is a "silence".....

    And what startles me is how powerful that drive is in all of us to search for it. As powerful as the drive to eat, to sleep, to breathe.....

    Nice write, Jane.....
    | Posted on 2011-12-04 00:00:00 | by rubie | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    193460

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Push written by JanePlane
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Bond written by saartha
    The Promise written by annie0888
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    This written by Chelebel
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Incubus written by monad
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry