Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I Do Not Love You Anymoredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: SHRINKSDR
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 476/375/39
    Words: 292
    Class/Type: Poetry/Angry
    Total Views: 537
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 637



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Do Not Love You Anymoredots
    -------------------------------------------




    I do not love you anymore.
    Though face is fair for evermore,
    Now, seems uglier than before.
    Face nor body do I abhor,
    But soul so evil to the core.
    And that is not a metaphor.
    Take your hatred I implore,
    Spewing toxin from every pore
    And briskly walk right out that door!
    "Quoth the raven, `Nevermore'!"




    Submitted on 2011-12-06 21:01:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      ha ha ha, this was a wonderful piece, great job. I feel like a lot of people can relate to it...

    and with humor and sassiness, I dig the piece.
    Not much else for me to say I enjoyed the flow and I thought you did a goood job with the rhyming without making it cheesy ( I think is hard to do )

    Very much enjoyed.
    | Posted on 2011-12-10 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      it seems the author is pointing out to the receiver that it's not their looks that are turning them off, but their actions. the way you say it's not "face nor body" that you "abhor", but the "soul so evil to the core". very eye opening - beauty is a good thing, but it must pour out from the inside to be truly of any worth. very nicely done.
    | Posted on 2011-12-08 00:00:00 | by gwenn sundala | [ Reply to This ]
      Happy Day!

    This is very Poe'ish.

    I liked the minimalistic verse with stabbing visuals.

    Awesome!

    Dark and Light Smiles 2 Share ;-)
    | Posted on 2011-12-07 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    193494

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Live In Between written by teika5
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry