Rhythmically this is very nice and I very much liked the end, which seemed to be very humble. I guess with all the rhythm and the rhyme it was a nice sobering moment and gave the poem some pause, and a look
at that honesty.
my goodness..spreads onthe braina and reads aloud wonderfully! great variety of words, highly skilled in meter and sound, now onto the clarity of the message...again a dead center hit on the target.
i liked the quick, liquid feewl, as though listening to wwater flow over a bumoy creekbed, like thoughts do in one's subconcious..each astanza was clean and unforced and the one word that caused me pause was the line at the end the "and cause...." i re read twice because my brain kept thinking because....but that is no faukt of yours! steev koster
pardon the typing just from 4 day hospital gig...still type uniquely ..nut this eve am outdoing my low standards. !