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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Broken and Prouddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mithrandir
    ASL Info:    28/m/N.Y.
    Elite Ratio:    4.62 - 452/681/113
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 555
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 849



    Description:
       I dont know


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBroken and Prouddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I will slip through your fingers
    don't bother dreaming
    I'm your's to save

    Broken, proud
    and still standing
    I'll be come the morning

    Just go to sleep

    Been haunting
    these empty halls
    far too long
    Nothing left
    only a ghost
    of what once was

    Just let me go

    Everyone falls
    all are broken
    in part

    Yet too many
    choose to stay down
    not this time

    Close your eyes
    only for a moment
    then I'll be gone

    strengths returning
    to these legs
    arms, and this heart.

    Broken and Proud
    I'll be come the morning
    Broken and Proud
    and you can't keep me down
    .




    Submitted on 2012-01-09 12:25:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow John!!! Holy Hanna it seems like forever since I've read your work. This has a beautifully broken feel to it. As though although broken hearted not dead, still breathing and trying to thrive. With each new day life gives way to options and choices which can make us stronger if we can see it for just that...a fresh start, clean slate, a way to rise above.
    I know I'm rambling now but I Love this. A true slice of life!!!

    strengths returning
    to these legs
    arms, and this heart



    That, for me, clenched the heart strings...brilliant



    Been haunting
    these empty halls
    far too long
    Nothing left
    only a ghost
    of what once was



    That is how I've felt coming back here to Elite, sorry nothing to do with the piece but totally summarizes how I feel here now...haunted into submission, taunted by the ghost of my voice.

    Anyhow!!!
    Back to your write...well done Sir!!! Awesome possum :)
    Was so Happy to see your name and even better to read your work!!!

    Kelly
    | Posted on 2012-01-09 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    193880

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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