this makes me think of circle. or maybe the square ones won. found more simple logic. idk. your work is always good but i don't get half of what you mean sometimes with these small ones. i think of it like a circle/cycle in a square. the circle lost because the cycle got stuck in the square. i guess that's my take. hopefully it's slightly a give.
A very haunting piece. Like another commenter, I'd like to know more about the smoke-girl and her situation. I love the fact that even though she was "once a girl" she can still look for the silver lining. You've captured both sadness and hope in this poem--very well done.
this is quite haunting, Bill. whenever i meet someone new i always think to myself, how they got to the state they are in. ive met men with 4.0 and two degrees from a major university that had lost everything and was now living in an abandon building smoking crack. etc...when i read this tale i cant help but think to myself, how did she become but a wisp? you always say so much in such few words...
Oh this reminds me of that proverbial "seedy" side of town shadey bar with the smell of stale beer & cigarette smoke but through it all you can always find beauty brighter then the glow of fluorescents or jukebox glare.
Or the ghost of a lover coming through in smoke rings hauntingly hovering as a halo never quite able to let her go.
Oh yes this is wonderful from all angles!!
The smoke is wise...I love watching smoke...whisps and clouds. Small things amuse and all I guess.
Honestly Bill, you have a gift of words (we all do) not everyone knows how to string them together so they sing life's poetic songs. I've not always been able to critique or even give good feedback but you have always held my attention and swept me away!