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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Breakingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: rev.jpfadeproof
    ASL Info:    27/m/nyc
    Elite Ratio:    6.14 - 366/359/149
    Words: 21
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 620
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 130



    Description:
       thankx for the thoughts and edits, Bill.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBreakingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    like ten thousand charging appaloosas
    in the breaking storm across the prairie
    of Brooklyn skies - I have loved you




    Submitted on 2012-01-11 13:59:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      You seem to have a gift for short verse, JP. I say, enjoy every experiment in whatever form or length it takes. These shorter posts are introspective, quiet, and powerful all at once.

    Nicely done.
    | Posted on 2012-01-12 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the brooklyn sky...

    this piece makes me imagine close to what Matt did...

    i just see a love so strong it feels to the speaker like being stampeded...being helpless to escape or resist..

    reading across the sky... this wonderful imagery compacted into such short space.

    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-01-12 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      Okay, I'm gonna try something here.
    What I saw was the appaloosas being the storm. The sound of their charge is the thunder; the quickness of their feet, the lightning; and the blurring of their colors, the grayish texture of the sky.

    An image of something so beautiful, gradually becoming a force of destruction...

    and then the past tense:

    I have loved you.

    Just so you know, I read this about ten times and stood dumbly at the screen trying to come up with a worthy analysis.

    A very...abstract image. I find a lot of beauty in this piece.

    Matt.
    | Posted on 2012-01-11 00:00:00 | by OneDarkFlame92 | [ Reply to This ]


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