I'm innocent deep down
Not completely corrupted, by the childhood I did all I could to make stop
There are feelings there somewhere
This tough exterior is simply that
A front put on so those feelings are never seen
I'm tired of this front
Of this act
No one knows me anymore
I have no one to blame but myself...
I live within a shallow dark world where I am surrounded by several
Yet when I look into others eyes
When I see the expression on their face as they look into my eyes
I see only what I give these people
That is a nonchalant, unemotional person,
a person unable to love
My past constantly dominates my present life
The pain I feel, is nothing words could ever describe
Yet here I am attempting to do just this...
23 years old, a young woman and still I rock myself to sleep, as I silently sob
Within this darkness I have seem to thrive within thus far
Why am I changing, why is this tough exterior crumbling now?
I'm completely lost, blinded by this pain I cannot shake
The darkness that has become my home,
Sadly, darkness I have allowed to consume me
Now tangled up within its web I am desperately trying to find a way home..
A home free of darkness
A place I can be me, whom ever that may be
Where I can find the ability to love