Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I Wrote A Bookdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: heartbrokenpoet
    Elite Ratio:    1.62 - 0/0/1
    Words: 220
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 402
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1226



    Description:
       A poem I was considering entering into a poetry contest, I was hoping to get feedback and some thoughts on how to maybe better this..


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Wrote A Bookdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I wrote a book today, spilling the seconds of our life

    sharing the very moment, you asked me to be your wife

    I wrote a book today, I filled it with my pride

    this journey I would only take, if I was to be your bride




    I wrote a book today, detailing our demise

    sitting alone on this bed, wallowing in your lies

    I wrote a book today, its words sheer poetry

    about the day you took that bus, forever leaving me




    I wrote a book today, of a part of me you never knew

    Emoting for lost love in my life, created solely by you

    I wrote a book today, pure helter skelter penned within

    Shadows linger over happiness, and what once could have been




    I mailed that book today, for your eyes to tear apart

    the only words contained within, is that you still have my heart

    I mailed that book today, now these words you know to be true

    Read in these pages words of woe, my cure now lies within you








    Submitted on 2012-02-27 22:32:00     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    194439

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Stem-bowed written by Angeles
    Drive written by Pietro
    ba da ba da bop! written by hyproglo
    utopia written by vedanta19
    Mid Section written by Chelebel
    Be-hulla-balye written by dancer-of-words
    Lunation & Lovers written by krs3332003
    untitled written by Narna
    The Fiddler written by krs3332003
    Lithograph written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Once written by closetpoet
    It's Personal written by Chelebel
    It Walked Between written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Around the Corner written by Torie
    Soaring Dreams written by Ramneet
    Once Again Be Blue written by lynn7
    The Grinder written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sonnet: Dinner of the Carnal written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lanterns of the Wisps written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Diminishing Ego written by Chelebel
    Breaking Free written by Janesaddiction
    She Said I Fell Off written by Latin King
    Catharsis 💩 written by Chelebel
    Blue written by closetpoet
    The Silver Clouds of Tomorrow's Rain written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Poets' Abode - Episode #1 written by krs3332003
    An open letter to my abuser written by S.A.M.
    what wakes me up at night written by SetmyselfonFire
    The Poets’ Abode – Episode #2 written by krs3332003
    6-11-16 written by Chelebel

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry