My feeling is that this is pretty much brilliant. By brilliant I don't mean that you are brilliant, I mean that aspects of the work are brilliant for holding that ability to show,
and therefore, articulate. In a way that is a more humble nod to you, and hopefully more meaningful.
I am distrustful of the way that punctuation often looks, and by this I mean that it can sometimes affect a piece of work with an articialdom (and yup, that's a word that seems to have created itself out of necessity (i always get the red line when I spell necessity, always)).
So, I don't like a mark on a page which denotes urgency or what have you in the way that a ! does.
To me, for me, it's like the writer is holding up a sign reading: 'anger' 'danger' 'kerfuffle'
and somehow that seems to take away from the seriousness of tone. So, I mention this because of the resounding thereness and acuteness of what you have managed to achieve. Better, imo, if you stay in the moment.
Is it? is always the question. We fling ourselves against barriers around us seemingly without purpose but is it? until death where it seems there must be the answer but is that answer to be? It may seem futile or is it? Live, love, be happy as you may seems best and not to worry about the small stuff because small stuff it is. - Jim
It's not the first of yours that I have read and appreciated, nor I hope the last. That you post them here is a tribute to your generosity towards the rest of us. Again your range of versatility is shown quite well, something that Glen hasn't been able to appreciate if this is his first. Visiting your page is like taking a bath of indulgence.
No, I will not "fav" this one, but you know the story on that. To me it would be kind of like putting out a fav on Shakespeare, Dickerson and the like. The word for that here is superfluous but you are just plain super.
i couldn't help but think of the movie "flatliners" when i read this...the experience of death...seeing ourselves in life...the bloodied dove...maybe the guilt of what we did do and some of what we didn't do...
do we want to look back...or did we just fall short of what we could have been...and are we afraid to see God when all is said and done.
i feel the terror and frenzy in this...
it's like wanting to and trying to wake up from a bad dream..and being so close but not quite able to...it's scary.
That is the most harrowing moment of philosophy that I have experienced this year. I don't usually like this sort of verse-form; but here it is exactly right for the story. And the story is clear with both truth and drama ... that is just what most readers of poetry want to read, unless they are so sophisticated that I couldn't understand them.
I think this is the first of your poems that I've read. I so so like it!