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Roleplay | Viral news today | Music Theory

Whispering to the Wind


Author: krs3332003
Elite Ratio:    6.44 - 146 /116 /67
Words: 112
Class/Type: Poetry /
Total Views: 2205
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 825



Description:

It was nice to get outside to write today...60F with a light breeze. Spring is so near!


Whispering to the Wind


In these resolute times
innocence is lost
hope becomes overwhelmed
with promises to keep

But moments of sanity
are clouded with angst
and soon fade into tears
Listen, the world is watching

Standing on a rainbow
prayers abound majestically
The light of all lights
for the weeping masses

Let it linger, let it sing
Implicit trust burning through
it holds the candle's beam
Only now is it understood

From distant hearts of illusion
bring memories of tomorrow
Mountains for love to ascend
for reality beckons no more

Much simpler to some
Carried away by feathered wings
for their price has been paid
Whispering to the wind




Submitted on 2012-03-11 12:14:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Loved the poem. It is a beautiful work depicting the reality of this current world. This poem is full of very impressive and very impactive lines. Kudos to you. Enjoyed your work.
| Posted on 2016-09-26 00:00:00 | by Ramneet | [ Reply to This ]
  "hope becomes overwhelmed/ with promises to keep"

those two lines surely fit so many scenarios...but these days the state of the world in general....what have we done to get this messed up...we hear politicians and others speak of hope, of "yes we can"

but we may as well whisper to the wind...because what we wish for is all blowing away in the wind..."distant hearts of illusion"

like there were "mountains of love to ascend" once---

but even they disappeared..

"reality is gone"

real has been replaced by disingenuous ---so much fakeness...so much hiding behind facades...

so much dishonesty...what can we really believe anymore?

what is the price for believing?

like this piece
although you probably meant it to be positive...just the old cynical me coming out.
jacob
| Posted on 2012-03-14 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
  I love the lines
"Hope becomes overwhelmed
With promises to keep."

I feel like each stanza is a little blip of consciousness, rather than it being one flowing poem. If it wasn't meant that where, there seems to be something stunting the transition from stanza to stanza.

It might be the lack of punctuation, which makes it so that I read it it where I want the punctuation to be, or where I assume they will be, and it messes up whatever flow you intended for the poem to have. Each stanza and each line is powerful within itself, but they have a hard time connecting together to form one poem, which makes it seem as if the poem is lacking one clear idea. But based on your description, that's probably what you wanted, more to capture fleeting feelings than a full idea, and if that was your goal, than you succeeded. You have a lot of gem statements here in this piece, and my favorite is of course the one I pointed out. I feel like sort of like it was one of those things where you see many people walking around with candles in honor of someone. I think it's called a Vigil.

| Posted on 2012-03-11 00:00:00 | by EmpathicAya | [ Reply to This ]
  I love the lines
"Hope becomes overwhelmed
With promises to keep."

I feel like each stanza is a little blip of consciousness, rather than it being one flowing poem. If it wasn't meant that where, there seems to be something stunting the transition from stanza to stanza.

It might be the lack of punctuation, which makes it so that I read it it where I want the punctuation to be, or where I assume they will be, and it messes up whatever flow you intended for the poem to have. Each stanza and each line is powerful within itself, but they have a hard time connecting together to form one poem, which makes it seem as if the poem is lacking one clear idea. But based on your description, that's probably what you wanted, more to capture fleeting feelings than a full idea, and if that was your goal, than you succeeded. You have a lot of gem statements here in this piece, and my favorite is of course the one I pointed out. I feel like sort of like it was one of those things where you see many people walking around with candles in honor of someone. I think it's called a Vigil.

| Posted on 2012-03-11 00:00:00 | by EmpathicAya | [ Reply to This ]


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